Crème de la Crematory

Featuring mostly original works of J. Y. Hopkins. _——————_————_——_ If you have questions, go ahead and ask.

Two Months

It’s been two months since my last post.


You can read. Okay, fine: “Bygone Days” by John Held Jr.

Booze, glorious booze
Drink right through the bar rail
Just open your throat
And then throw down for real…

I don’t drink anymore. I’m not in a program or on orders from the court or a doctor. I just haven’t been doing it. No big deal. It’s not that I will never drink again.

Lots of coffee. Lots of tisane. (But more coffee.)

If you really want to know, I stopped drinking alcohol because I started taking NSAIDs, because I’m a wimp. There, I said it. I didn’t want my stomach to bleed or kidneys to fail, because I’m a total wimp. I don’t even take the maximum recommended dosage. I take as little as possible. But I hate taking pills of any kind. Except vitamins.

I wrote a little on that cyborg thing. Not doing NaNoWriMo for real, but I’m hoping to make substantial headway on it, regardless of how long it will eventually be. There will be a draft of something by the end of the month. Good time to get on the cyborg train what with Ghost in the Shell and DC’s Cyborg/Justice League and the whole “Is technology making everybody insane?”-thing. Is technology making everybody insane? Or is it the last firewall holding against the onslaught of natural insanity? Only cyborgs know for real. The rest of us can only look and wonder, through a backlit glass screen, darkly (but not too darkly).

An Idea

I came up with a good sci-fi story idea. Cyborg-related.

Stories are kind of overrated though. Usually, I don’t care. The situation is the story. The status is the poetry. The arrangement is the prize. I don’t aim to “manipulate” readers into “feeling” as though the narrated events are important. I want to produce a textual portrait which portrays itself via text. (Haha.)


Can anyone write a novel as good as this picture?


That picture is by Virgil Finlay (d. 1971), from Amazing Stories December 1961 (via Gutenberg). Some of his stuff is great, some is just okay. Check him out while you’re waiting for my epic slice-of-cyborg-life book to arrive. Happy Friday.

NFL 2016, the whole thing broken down

Loyal (haha), attentive (hahahahaha) readers will notice a few differences between this year’s list and last year’s. (No link to last year’s. It is private.) Firstly, the Rams moved to California. I still like them though. Second, I like fewer teams. A few teams I used to like fell out of favor with me, so they flipped over. I now like only nine NFL teams.



Kansas City Chiefs: I don’t like the Kansas City Chiefs.

Oakland Raiders: I like the Oakland Raiders.

San Diego Chargers: I don’t like the San Diego Chargers.

Denver Broncos: I don’t like the Denver Broncos.

Jacksonville Jaguars: I don’t like the Jacksonville Jaguars.

Houston Texans: I don’t like the Houston Texans.

Tennessee Titans: I like the Tennessee Titans.

Indianapolis Colts: I don’t like the Indianapolis Colts.

Baltimore Ravens: I don’t like the Baltimore Ravens.

Cleveland Browns: I like the Cleveland Browns.

Pittsburgh Steelers: I don’t like the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Cincinnati Bengals: I don’t like the Cincinnati Bengals.

Miami Dolphins: I don’t like the Miami Dolphins.

Buffalo Bills: I don’t like the Buffalo Bills.

New York Jets: I like the New York Jets.

New England Patriots: I like the New England Patriots.



San Francisco 49ers: I don’t like the San Francisco 49ers.

Seattle Seahawks: I don’t like the Seattle Seahawks.

Los Angeles Rams: I like the Los Angeles Rams.

Arizona Cardinals: I don’t like the Arizona Cardinals.

New Orleans Saints: I like the New Orleans Saints.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: I like the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Carolina Panthers: I don’t like the Carolina Panthers.

Atlanta Falcons: I don’t like the Atlanta Falcons.

Detroit Lions: I don’t like the Detroit Lions.

Chicago Bears: I don’t like the Chicago Bears.

Minnesota Vikings: I don’t like the Minnesota Vikings.

Green Bay Packers: I like the Green Bay Packers.

Philadelphia Eagles: I don’t like the Philadelphia Eagles.

Washington Redskins: I don’t like the Washington Redskins.

Dallas Cowboys: I don’t like the Dallas Cowboys.

New York Giants: I don’t like the New York Giants.

An Oppositive Proposal

Literature is important, but a novel is not.
Cinema is important, but a movie is not.
Art is important, but a painting is not.

I propose, instead of broadening our sense of import to include all work produced at all times, that we return to a stance of total skepticism towards art, indeed an assumption of unimportance until proven otherwise. Let us assume a work will cause no impact upon arrival, no matter how many people experience it. Let us assume works are not going to change anybody’s mind about anything, nor open doors, nor evoke/invoke something beyond themselves. Let us assume it is all mere entertainment until we can no longer in good faith consider it such. Rather than elevate everything, let us scuttle the barge.

Naturally, anyone at any time will remain free to make their case; but no one will be expected to consider “a case” to be something reasonable people should make about creative works of entertainment media.

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (a real blog post)

[No Pictures from the Film]

You might find it hard to believe, but Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is only about five months old. Movies come and go pretty quickly, even financially successful ones. BvS didn’t make as much as people might’ve hoped relative to its budget, but it brought in quite a bit of dough and a lot of people watched it. So, there’s that.

An overall critical failure, the film nevertheless achieves certain obvious functions. It introduces the new scenario in which some characters will meet, and it introduces some of those characters.

I don’t care that it was “gritty” or whatever. Comic movies can be “fun” too. Like comics, they can have different tones. Boo-hoo if you like some more than others and think that’s something which needs to be addressed. I resist popular critical narratives such as “The MCU is the gold standard” and “The DCEU is already floundering and doesn’t understand comics”. Iron Man was a good movie, but it wasn’t any better than the Hellboy films. BvS had faults, but so did Guardians of the Galaxy. People forgive (or can’t see) GotG‘s missteps because, as a “fun” movie, it’s okay that it doesn’t make sense or is clichéd or is prone to familiar blockbuster tropes. A “serious” movie like Man of Steel isn’t supposed to utilize easy structure or plot devices, but it seems in many people’s books goofy movies can do so without suffering. Ostensibly, “Good for what it is” applies to cartoony movies, but not to melodramas.

Read the rest of this entry »

Equual (meaning “horse-like”)


Some possible articles:

  • Some hot man-on-mansplaining
  • It’s too bad jazz is so …
  • A lot of things are too bad.
  • Wokeness/Engagement ratios
  • The wigs we weave: Synthetics, old news
  • Fake eyelashes: Eye-wigs
  • A lot of people say a lot of things.
  • The world: Jail in a jambasket?


Kenneth Goldsmith makes “the case for plagiarism.

(via Real Pants )


Guy’s a novelty act. “Well rewarded” for his plagiarism = A job at a university. Don’t feel too special. This article is not merely a rhetorical failure, it’s trite. It’s just one more iteration of a career-long fallacy. Could I say more? Indeed, I could. Perhaps I’ll craft a prospectus. Each copy will employ a unique font and watermark. You’ll never read it and can therefore never write it yourself.